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Wednesday, March 9, 2016

It Is Perfectly Acceptable To Have A Healthy Ego!

Last year I posted a photo on my Facebook. It was a nice photo of myself, my daughter, my mother, and my grandmother. The photo was to show four generations of the ladies in my family. It was related to one of my blog posts but a simple post called "Happiness Is". You may have seen some of these cheerful posts I write from time to time. It was unrelated to my business as a blogger, and unrelated to any sponsored posts. Someone who was at that time, a Facebook friend, a male, if that makes any difference, commented on my post something to the effect that I was the one with the biggest head.

It Is Perfectly Acceptable To Have A Healthy Ego!

Now it is a fact that I often post blog related content on both my Facebook Fan Page and personal profiles, although I rarely promote my blog on my personal Facebook page. Still, evidently this individual thought I was either gloating, had an inflated ego, or something else. Perhaps he did not understand that promoting my articles is not ego driven as much as a part of growing my business as a blogger. Regardless it brought me to thinking about ego, and the realization that there isn't much in life that is in not someway or another ego driven!

What is wrong with being ego driven anyway!? 

Being driven by ego can make us better employees, bosses, even parents! It all depends on what we invest in, what actually drives our egos. From athletes, to musicians, not to mention politicians, chefs, to artists, all ego driven individuals in ego driven expertise. Being ego driven does not apply only to politicians. My husband is extremely ego driven in his work place, and I am proud of him for that because in less than two years he has received two promotions and is now one of the bosses! This brings him joy, and it makes me happy because he is happy. He does not go around strutting like a rooster crowing self praise but he is proud of himself, as he should be.

Now I am a grown up and I was not hurt by his catty comment. I am also lucky to have some great friends who put him in his place by coming to my defense. I personally did not defend myself because he was not worth my time and energy. He really was not worth the time and energy of my friends either but I am grateful to those who spoke up for me and it touched my heart, and hey maybe my ego too!

Never apologize for having a strong ego! Now sure, there are some people who have egos way too big to fit into a room, and maybe need to take a chill pill, or be given a dose of reality! There are ways to have a healthy ego and allow it to be fed and there is nothing wrong with that. If anything what I find on a daily basis are those who need to feed their ego more than they do.

Ego is related to self esteem and sometimes one who has an inflated ego in one area is compensating for a deflated ego in another area. Other times a person who has a low self image will set out and challenge themselves to do something in the very area that they feel they need work on.

It Is Perfectly Acceptable To Have A Healthy Ego!
The Image I Had Posted On My Facebook That "Warranted" Such A Comment! 
Ironically that is one of the reasons Fashion Beyond Forty was born! I had become that stay at home work at home mom who's kiddos were almost all grown up. I found myself living in PJ's or a ratty tee shirt and shorts, and not because I could, or because I wanted to, but because I had lost motivation, or reason to get dressed! That is sad! I recognized I needed a change! I recognized I was not only diminishing my own self worth, but that it was effecting others in my life as well. I have another article coming out soon about that. Regardless, I never started my blog out of an inflated ego, yet my self worth, my self esteem has grown since I started blogging, and I refuse to apologize for that.

I want everyone to understand and know it is okay to have a strong ego. I want women to praise each other for having a good sense of self, self worth, and self esteem. Now I am not talking about the women who are actually disempowering themselves by posting blatant sexualized selfies. Granted there can be empowerment in that as well for some women, in some circumstances. Even in cases I see this I do not judge unless I personally know that woman's story.

I know one thing my daughter will never say about me is that I failed to believe in myself. I want all young women to grow up with strong female role models. Women who feel empowered, proud, self assured, and all of those things stem from ego. I want this for all young men as well. 

So what if sometimes our interests or hobbies seem shallow or trite. So what if one of my Facebook friends from high school thinks I am showing off or being self serving posting my latest fashion statement. I truly find my new pair of boots no less important to the recent upgrade you made to your motorcycle, or the latest concert you attended. I happen to enjoy those things as well and if you took the time to actually read my blog and know me, you would see I have a lot more going on than the latest fashion fad. 

We all have the propensity to be shallow in some ways, sure. Makeup, a million and one ways to use bacon, the most current health product on the market, all of this is meaningless to the family who just lost their home. However many of those same "shallow" or ego ridden people out there are also the ones going out and doing volunteer work, making monitory donations, or crusading for a cause they believe in. 

We can not function as a society without ego but that does not mean some of us do not need to check ours at the door every now and then. I find it is not those posting images of themselves, taking selfies, or bragging about their new car that need the ego check, rather those who say cruel things about them, poking holes in their happiness, those are the ones who do!

I love comments! Please join in discussion, ask questions, or leave tips for other readers. Comments truly are the driving force behind any blog as it helps the blogger to know what you, the reader want to see more of!

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