I first began Fashion Beyond Forty because one day I realized that I had stopped taking the time to look nice. I had actually stopped taking the time to get dressed most days. The reason this was so ironic to me is because in my younger days I was quite into fashion and style. At one point in my late teens I had attended a fashion school because I thought I wanted to become a designer. Those days clearly are long behind me, but my interest in fashion never ceased. What ceased was having time for myself, taking the time to shop, and pamper myself. I think it is a dilemma many women get into but not all women! In fact I admire the mom's out there who can juggle their children's school, extra curricular activities, their own careers, shopping, cooking, cleaning, and everything else a woman has to manage on a day to day basis. Those of you who can do all of this and still look trendy, stylish, or like they even care, you have my admiration!
When I started Fashion Beyond Forty I did so in order to motivate myself to pay attention, take care of me again. It has worked and then some! I also hope it has been a motivator for some of you as well.
What I never thought about back in the days of "letting myself go" was that maybe in doing so I was actually hurting my kids and family rather than helping them! I always thought to myself, I will worry about how I look when I have time to again. I never thought that the way I looked could have made my kids feel less of themselves!
In retrospect I believe it is very important to look good for your family. No you do not have to dress like a runway model, that just is not practical in day to day life. What is practical and important is showing confidence, both inner and outer confidence. Let's face it, in our society we do pass first impression judgements, and we can expect others to do so in return.
My son and I used to debate these issues. He swore that what a person wears does not matter. I told him perhaps it should not matter but it does and made my point and case by asking him what his friends would think if he suddenly started wearing suits instead of his regular clothes. Clearly he would not "fit in", would raise a few eye brows, and probably have some jokes slinged his way. Now keep in mind at the time my son and I had this discussion he was in high school, and his friends and he would wear fun colorful shirts of bizarre things like cats with laser eyes. Yeah that is a thing. My point was, and still is, that it does not matter what type of fashion you are into, you are into some type of fashion, or you simply are not. There is no in between. My son did not even realize he was in fact making a fashion statement. I further explained to him that even the hippies from back in my day had a style, which has now circumvented into what we know as bohemian, or boho. I went on to explain how the people I grew up with at my parents biker bar had a style, and they still do! We also tone this down for the mainstream and call it "edgy".
Style is all around us, always will be, so it is important to have some style. When you spend your day literally tossing on a ratty pair of shorts and the cleanest tee you can find, that is not style! Yet, that is what I had become.
My top 5 reasons why your style is important to your kids / grandkids:
1. When you have confidence and self worth, your kids will grow up with more confidence and self worth.
2. Your children will be judged by others, so your behavior, the way you look, and carry yourself can be a positive or negative for them.
3. You yourself will be judged by the parents of your children's friends. The more you take care of yourself the better type of people you will draw to your children. Your children will be more likely to have a good network of friends with approving parents. Plus you can also be a little more discerning in who you allow your own children to hang around with. We can't be hypocritical now can we!?
4. Keeping up on the latest fashion trends will help you keep connected to you teen kids, plus help you help them stay on the right fashion track! The way kids dress these days is a good indication of their feelings about themselves, and the type of peers they are connecting with.
5. When you look better you will feel better. One would not go into a job interview in their bathrobe. Why face any day looking like you just rolled out of bed? When you feel better, your kids, or grandkids will be happier.
I would love for you to add to this list in the comments below. I am sure there are a lot of other positive reasons I have left out.