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Thursday, January 21, 2016

It's Official I'm An Empty Nester So Now What?

So last weekend my daughter officially moved into her own place making me officially an empty nester. 

Not having either of my "kids" at home leaves two empty rooms, and a lot of empty time for me.Now granted, since my daughter just moved I know there will be things she needs, and that she still needs me, just as my son does in his own ways, yet the house seems so still. 

It's Official I'm An Empty Nester So Now What?

I am thankful I have many pets to keep me company, and busy, and of course I have my work.Working from home however does not give me much of a social outlet or means to feel company in my midst. 

While I am always going to welcome my kids back into their family home if they need to return, I have to admit, I am day dreaming about what to do with the extra space. Some ideas are practical while others may be a bit outlandish. 

My husband works rotating shifts of 12 hours each, with an hour dive time to get home. 
This means I have a topsy turvy schedule myself, plus a lot of alone time. 

While I have a whole list of things I can get done, need to do, want to do, could do, and so forth, I still find myself in the flux of not quite ready to do any of it yet. It has only been a few days after all.
I am still in limbo mode. 

In a way it almost feels like it is time for me to grow up now. Of course I do not mean in the traditional sense, but it is a transition time for sure. It is perhaps time for me to do all of those things that I said I wanted to do when my kids were older, or in my retirement. Since I will most likely never completely retire from my blogging, which is a part of my daily work life, there is really no reason to put some of the things on my "bucket list" off. 

Empty Nester Bucklist

The strange thing is, now that I reflect upon my list of things I want to do when my kids are older, I find many of those things no longer interest me. I also am still quite a bit bound to the home for my pets, which are also a huge part of our family. I can not see leaving them for a long period of time just so that I can check off a few bucket list items. Granted I may still have plenty of time, but then again one never knows how much time one has left. This is especially true when one has life long health issues like myself. I mean I am totally optimistic, but keeping it real. 
I also worry about how my daughter will fair out in the world on her own. While she is a very smart young woman with excellent common sense, she does have two serious medical conditions that I worry about. All mothers worry, it is part of the deal, but I try not to be too smothering - although smother is just mother with an s at the beginning. 

Smother is just Mother with an S at the beginning

I realize I am not the only woman in this stage of life right now, many have come before me, and many will come in my wake. I do wonder however if other mothers go through a period like myself, where you wonder "what's next?" I also would think some mothers go through a stage of empty nest depression. Luckily my daughter only moved about 15 minutes away from home, and we speak, or text daily. 

Overall I am so happy for her and my joy of her new beginning into "adulting" as she calls it. She is nervous, I am nervous for her too. She knows when that first wave of bills hit the romance of having her own place will fade a little. I hope for her it does not fade entirely. 

In the mean time I will continue to have strange conversations with my dog, such as asking her if she ever wonders why I only have two feet and she has four. I get the same reciprocal blank state my kids always gave me and it feels nice. 

I would love to hear about your empty nest transition if you care to leave me a comment below. I always reply back.

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